I have warned myself more than once not to always live in my heart, but how easy is it to avoid the past in my heart

I have warned myself more than once not to always live in my heart, but how easy is it to avoid the past in my heart? There is the bitter waiting under the flowers, the helplessness in the falling leaves, the sourness of having to leave, and the unforgettable and deep-rooted separation and reunion. After experiencing so much, I can only say that maybe being carefree does not mean happiness in life. I often worry about my life, so I keep thinking about it. It is through thinking that I can be freed from the tedious life and thus Live more calmly.

I’m not a person with indifferent feelings, so it’s not always easy to erase the people I associate with from my memory. So, I can only get lost in the forest of the past over and over again.

It takes courage to bear this kind of loss. It’s really bitter.

In the cultivation of human nature, people have to endure endless inner divisions, self-analysis, and even self-abuse. No one can avoid the disillusionment of illusions, the helplessness of not being able to hold hands in love, the reality is like this, as long as you can accommodate the past with your heart, everything will stand on the cliff of longing as a kind of scenery. Its gaze stares into the distance, where the lights are dim, there must be its own yearning. Not every dream will come true, and not every wish will have time to wait for you to realize. When the reality tells me this, you have already walked out of my world and are getting farther and farther away from me.

Five years ago, I was like this when I was in love, and five years later, it was like this when I was in love. I stood blankly, silent without any thought, the loess under my feet had already drunk all the bitterness.

I really don’t want to bring this up again, because bringing up the past in my memory will only bring pain.

I can’t tell you, only your comfort can keep me away from sadness. But if I don’t tell you, even if thousands of years have passed, you will not understand how I watched you come from far away, and how I watched you go away. The torrential rain once drenched my eyes and my mood at that time.

I can’t deny that I live for you consciously or unconsciously, and everything I do must take your mood into consideration. However, you never urged me to share your happiness, and you never let me into your life. This is what has disturbed me all my life. I don’t know if I should express my attachment to you and my pain after you left. I can’t imagine whether I will wait for you forever, although you don’t know this kind of waiting.

I heard them say that waiting is the ultimate happiness. I also heard them say that waiting is an indescribable pain in life.

I don’t know whether the waiting I am about to start is happiness or pain.

You left in a hurry without any regrets. In fact, there is nothing to miss, there is not even a past between us. This is my sorrow. I have no way to blame anyone, but I blame myself for not covering up the surge of my heart with the silence like still water. I can’t blame you because, at best, I’m just a crush. Although everything about me is bright and dark because of you, you don’t know all of this, and you live happily in a world other than me.

After you left, there was a kind of episode that I called waiting. I made up my loneliness and locked up my happiness. I know that the road of waiting leads to loneliness. So, I had no choice but to be busy in loneliness, trekking on an aimless journey, and treat my short life well during this trek. I am very tired. Tired of this reality. In a world without you, I don’t face loneliness, distress, or struggle with this reality. So, the pain came, the sadness came, and some things that should come and shouldn’t come.

The idea of having you by my side has almost become an increasingly unrealistic fantasy, although I am still waiting patiently. But only when I think of you in the depths of the night, I know that I am still persisting. Therefore, I have no friends so far, even friends who are as light as water.

I’m just accumulating my feelings and living the life of a walking dead. I don’t want this either, but the yellow leaves fall to the ground like colorful butterflies that can’t dance. You are not here, I hide my thoughts over and over again. Emotions have been suppressed for thousands of years, but they are finally calm. Maybe only when I hold them out like I do, there will be painful anxiety.

I’ve always been unwilling to accept this reality, but you have left a world that doesn’t belong to you far away, walking in such a peaceful way. I can only wave goodbye to my mind. I really want you to live in my sight, even if it is not for me, I will be happy because of you, busy because of you, endlessly.

You told me that you liked him unconditionally, just like I like you. I understand this feeling, I brush the messy hair on my forehead, and don’t make any comments on your story. Today, many years later, you may understand what kind of infatuation you have failed and what kind of season you have missed. At that time, I made up my mind that if I like you, how can I not go through the wind and rain. But now it seems that that is just my opinion and has nothing to do with you. Now, I have to let go, and my sadness flows into a west wind, which blows in my world for a long time. I hold a feast for the past, and the beginning of everything is the end.

The waving hand failed to keep you in the end. The autumn wind is raging in my world, friend, can you understand my mood at that time? Know how I felt at the time?

No one can read my mind, for this reason, I am very sad.

I lit the cigarette and let the lingering smoke waft along with my thoughts——I wanted to downplay these thoughts. The smoke blackened my fingers, but I still haven’t returned from the past. The rhythm of my heartbeat has become a melody, playing for you forever. Will you be happy about it?

Burning everything written for you is like burning my soul. I know that I should go, and stay away from this world that does not belong to me. We should also forget how a lonely boat endured the pain of going upstream. I put my palms together in my heart, bless you, and wish you a happy life.

In the days without you, my heart loses its strength and can only lie dormant in fantasy. I know that it is difficult for it to get out of all kinds of beautiful fantasies that assume you are there.

I want to write something about you, but when I think about it carefully, there is nothing to write. All I can write is my mood and my feelings after you left.

Woohoo! I can only mourn again.

I finally couldn’t stop thinking about you crazily. Just like the lovebirds carrying heavy lovesickness, get rid of the barriers of thousands of mountains and rivers, and finally fly to your side.

The letter six months later brought me a thousand joys for a person who had long given up any illusions. I exile the pain and loneliness brought about by the long and long expectation to the frontier of my heart. With your echo, I can no longer abuse myself.

I know that love is not about sowing golden seeds and reaping green hopes. I’ve known for a long time that you still have to live your life and I still have to live mine, but I’m comfortable writing to you. Everything weighed in my heart, and I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t take it anymore. To be honest, I have to thank you, it is you who let me experience the joy and bitterness of giving. When I understood this, my heart was very calm. How can I live without you in the future? I’m at a loss.

In the end, I still couldn’t prevent myself from being alone again. The long night was spent in a room under a humble lamp. I’m afraid that the lives of you and me will be very different because of the space barrier. So far, I have A feeling of wanting to cry.

When the moon bends, lovesickness also bends. The moon is full, how about lovesickness?

I don’t know and no one told me.

Others say that the power of love is enough to dominate everything, it will bring happiness to people, and it will also bring pain. But what about my love? What did it bring me?

So far, I haven’t found the answer.

For so many years, I have been sticking to my silence, and it has not changed. The silence of this indifference is astonishing. Perhaps, silence is my avoidance of not daring to face reality!

It is not easy to erase a loved one from your heart, even if you find that she is not worthy of your love. If that’s the case, it only means that the love you gave was not real in the first place.

I became helpless, wandered around, and became a sinner who had never committed a crime, but none of this made me feel more uncomfortable than your leaving. They all said that sincere love is produced in labor and in the common life of both parties, and can stand the test of time and money. I was stunned, you are just a red cloud I look up to, you are so far away from me, how can we talk about labor, how can we talk about living together, but my love has withstood the test of time and money, what should this be called? Isn’t it true love?

I’m quite confused.

Really, I love you, the more I hide it, the harder it is to erase you from my heart. My love is to call you, who knows, where did my courage make me forget the definition of timidity and parallel lines. At that moment, I was moved, and I even shed precious tears facing the past. I heard your voice, I wiped my eyes vigorously, your words are no longer indifferent. You said that there is friendship besides love. My eyes became blurred from clear, and covered with a thin layer of tears.

A long, long time ago, I lost my joy and let the cry of the red-lipped bird drag the blue sky far away. I’ve turned the night into a circle to enclose my irregular surges and thoughts, I’ve tried to stick my feet out the window, count my toes, and devise a plan to get out of my confusion, but it all failed because I still have some hopes for you.

Sometimes, love doesn’t work, it doesn’t solve any problems. The rain on the glass can only be used to weave a colorful ideal world. To be honest, I have always believed that love is beautiful, just like the setting of trophies, it always leaves people with great hope and temptation. But after the end of the song, some scars will be vividly seen. That kind of pain is not something that can be faced just by facing it.

You have your own happiness and your own emotional life, but I am still struggling in a world without you, living a very tired and helpless life. The dark sky is the best interpretation of the mood.

I put on the earphones and let the crazy music roar in my ears, but it still couldn’t make me return from the illusion. That inexplicable emotion gushed out from the depths of my heart again, and I couldn’t help it.

Can I really forget about you and become happy easily?

Woohoo! I don’t know.

For so long, I’ve been like a wanderer, relying only on infatuation to pursue the emotion that never belongs to me. I don’t know, how long will this kind of day last? At this time, the wind is shaking, the moon is shaking, I know, your smile must be shaking, and your mood must be shaking too. In order to wait for you, I stood under the neon lights and became a landscape, waiting for you for a century. Can you understand the wandering song composed from the depths of your life? I have many stories, waiting for you to end, waiting for you to draw a full stop. For this wish, I let the dense street cars stomp on my sight at will. I know that my performance without any embellishments will never impress you, the audience, but you are the only spectator of this play, as long as you tap your palm a few times, my clumsy lines will also be empty Go back and forth a few times on the street, and then I will be happy in your arms, smiling for centuries.

I understand that you will never come into my world, so I can only sort out the gaffes of all the frustrated people in ancient and modern times. You throw my eyes into the endless wind, and make the stars in the sky laugh at my madness.

You are so cruel.

Living for you is the greatest tragedy in China, and you will always live outside the tragedy. My crazy busyness can no longer conceal the loneliness in my heart. Maybe, I should write something again. I can’t see you. Writing something will make my heart surge and slowly return to calm. Picking up the pen and seeing your smile right in front of me, I can only sigh against the column. I don’t know when my life has been deeply scarred by rebellion. But you don’t know that the snow elves in northern Xinjiang still maintain the warmest notes in the coldest season.

Standing on the edge of loneliness, I stare into the distance. Who can understand that unintentional remembering and unintentional remembering are sometimes not a kind of happiness. My world is full of ups and downs. I have exhausted all my strength, but I still cannot penetrate your world. Really, you may never know how attached I am to you in this life.

How many times have I had the opportunity to confess to you over the years, but I have never been able to muster up the courage. I dare not confess to you, for fear of disrupting the tranquility of your world, and for fear that my careless appearance will affect your life. My love finally prevails in the model of no fate. I can’t depend on you for life, I can only look at you across the sea. For this, I will regret it for the rest of my life.

Saying goodbye to the past is like tearing yourself apart and stitching it up again. It hurts to tear yourself apart, but it hurts even more when you stitch it up again. Moths to the flame, Phoenix Nirvana is nothing more than that. Maybe there was an arrangement in the dark, did you know the ending a few years ago, but I just woke up from my dream a few years later and raised my heavy hand to you. The deep alley finally came to an end.

I feel relieved. I put my heart back to the original place and returned to my original starting point.

While I cared about you, I didn’t expect that there has been a kind of emotion that I don’t know has been caring and caring for me for several years. I also can’t tell who is hoarse in the song of dawn when the world wakes up.

She asked me if I could know the story between me and her, and I shook my head with difficulty. There may be only one touching story in life, and this story can only be told to one person. And she just isn’t.

Seeing her sad, I feel sad too.

I will no longer have love, so I can only stand where she can’t see, and feel the boiling youth with my heart. I know, I shouldn’t do this. But I can’t control myself.

Really, I told her not to stand in the faint setting sun as an eternity, filling my field of vision and bringing me an indelible fragrance. Then I will inevitably touch my heart for this reason, and the sad string in my heart will vibrate and flow out a sad melody.

In the coordinates of my life, who will be whose wandering cloud.

I understand that waiting is an indescribable pain. Citing the vicissitudes of the past to confirm Ruyan’s feelings is like peeling off a section of the dream of dancing with you. That feeling hurts and hurts.

In the end, I ruthlessly rejected her. I took a short mountain walk with her. When I woke up that day, she led a man who loved her and stood in front of me. I knew that it was time for me to go my way. I don’t want to be your rib, live with you, and die with you.

One day, when I present all the diaries I wrote for you in front of you, then we may be in our twilight years and no longer young. At that time, you must be surprised that the boy who was shy, introverted, somewhat arrogant and not good at talking had such rich emotions.

Giving up on your pursuit is like going through a season. These fragments are all I can write about yesterday and dare to show you.